Rain

I can't say I've made it through this year unscathed,
I sometimes wonder how I got from then to today,
But when I look back on this year,
I am just happy that I am still here,
It's been long,
It's been hard,
And through it, I've earned it all,
I've had experiences that I cannot explain,
And even through the sweat and the pain,
I can say that I have danced in the rain

Sometimes the hardest thing to do is forget,When you've had so much with one person,
Just to throw it all away?
It seems like me that I'll betray,
My heart is mine again, I've taken it back,
And even though it might crack,
I'm holding it tight,
I'm not giving it to anyone who doesn't deserve it this time.

Sometimes losing everything just means your life begins,It isn't as bad when you open your eyes, and your life is yours again,
You can see things from a new perspective,
Never worry about life being hectic,
Because when you've been knocked down and you've had nothing to say,
You know that you have yourself to rely on,
And that is worth it at the end of the day,

Sleep

Sleep evades; alas, it is late,
But night is the time that my thoughts plague,
I toss about, tangled in covers, my mind running with the time of the clock,
To find myself thinking, It is not a shock,
My heart is aching, desire of what cannot be,
The only time I allow it to run free,
Midnight sounds and still sleep still taunts me,
I want so badly to go that when I dream,
I want so badly to wake that I scream.
So here I lie, staring at the ceiling,
Lying awake, with this empty feeling.

Within the Heart Lies More

I write with poets pen,
I cannot be caged, I have fire within,
I cannot stand back, I tip toward the war,
I wage with the enemy, it burns to the core.

Heal

You have to bleed before you heal,
And stand after you kneel,
You cannot die before you live,
You have to take after you give.

Alive?

What is the point of living if there is no life?
And then, what is the point of life if there is no love?
I am not alive, just because I am breathing,
Oh liar liar, you're so good at deceiving,
But who is this staring back at me? This mirror image, yet it doesn't breathe,
Save me from this life I can't begin to start leaving,
I'm not alive just because I'm breathing...

Sneak Peek!!!

"You're not like other girls, Sweetheart," Mom patted her shoulder in the most annoying fashion.
She'd said it a million times, and Faith always had the same reply, "I know."
And boy, she knew.
Ever since the accident-which she recalled with fuzz on the edges-she hadn't been the same.
Trying for the thousandth time to reach the cup on the bottom shelf of the cupboard, she still couldn't reach it.
And for the thousandth time, she wished she could stand up and use her paralized legs.

My head is aching from this silence,
And my heart beating is all I hear,
Except you lyin' to yourself,
Sayin' there's nobody else,
Well, I get your drift,
You're gonna switch lanes and shift,
Pass all the signs and take all the money,
In the middle of nowhere, run out of gas,
Well, you deserve it, honey.

When I close my eyes, your hand fits perfectly in mine,
A look in your eyes, and it stops time,
And I can hear the things you say,
"My heart is only yours,and I'll be yours until the world ends, I pray,"
I can see your heart, you wear it on your sleeve,
And when I open my eyes and find you nowhere in sight,
I call out for some sort of reprieve,
From this ache in my heart,
Because I know that you aren't mine,
And never will be, unless this sun don't shine,

I've built up these walls high and tall,
But then you come along and knocked them down with nothing at all,
I don't know what I felt at that point, vulnerable?
I suppose that you're not the one for me,
But I'm not so strong as I thought I would be,
I figured I could handle this course,
Of jumps and hurdles, I guess it was worse

Romeo and Juliet

Possibly the most famous play in the entire world. I am reading the script right now, and am memorizing bits and pieces. Here is one from complete memory;

"But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun. Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon that is sick and pale with grief, That  thou her maid art more fair than she: Be not her maid, since she is envious. Her vestal livery is but sick and green, and none but fools do wear it, cast it off! It is my lady, O, my love, That she knew she were!..."

:) I love love

I want them to see how pretty I am,
I don't care how I get the attention,
Some say I might be vain,
But when I look in the mirror,
I want to see beauty,
Not just a plain-jane,
This make-up I'm wearing will hopefully hide what I don't want to see,
And I hope it'll cover up what makes me, me,
I wanna be different,
But I'm told that everybody does,
So doesn't that make me just like them?
So I guess in the end, I'll just blend into the crowd,
And I'll end up the same as all of them, for the sake of my being proud

Wicked

And unto the wicked ways I am born and I have craved,
And from the wicked ways I was saved,
The waywardness of a wicked whisper,
The fruitfulness of a blister,
And who am I to come to Christ?
To ask to be saved, I am the worth of blight,
I should be told to get out of His sight,
But instead, he takes me in,
Keeps me from a cold and awful night

[Untitled]

You reject me when I'm there for you,
You call out my name in vain when I'm silent,
You curse me and spit on my face when I tell you no,
You plead for me when you are scared,
Now you must reap what you have sowed

You're in a pit of mire,
This state that you are in,
You think you are so cool, living in this life of sin,
You think you can just turn your back on me,
When in all actuality,
I could strike you dead,
but this love I have for you,
Means more even than I have said,
So I spare your life,
Knowing you will seek me,
And when you do, I will be there to answer,
You will knock on my door, and I will give you the key

Funny how I can be so brittle,
Right on the edge of going insane,
And just because of you,
From the first time I even saw your name,
Emotions are a tricky thing,
They try to let you go,
To let you fall in love,
To blind you to the truth,
And then when it really counts,
They give you a good shove,
Back into reality with a jolt,
Cut into your flesh like a lightening bolt,
How can this pain be so real?
I don't even know you,
But I feel like I'm loosing you,
Am I just selfish?
I'll retreat now,
Back into my heart and head,
I'll just try to block the pain instead,
To just shut my eyes and put on a smile,
It's so much easier to lie...

You dont look very happy in contrast to the smile plastered on your face,
Such a fake, nasty happy,
The kind that you just want to hate,
Your fake laugh and fake nails,
Your fake skin and fake eyelashes,
You are just one big made up script,
Something that you don't even know,
Like a creature from another world,
Just here to put on a show,
And for what reason?
Do you think that you can benefit from all this?
Because I don't see a reason why you would want to go on being a glitch,
Stuck in the system of life,
Chaotic and jumbled,
Who should you look to?
Not I or yourself,
But Jesus, the one that is holy and true.

Nail Pierced Hands

when we think of Jesus,
we think of a manger and a Lamb,
a Lion and Man,
We never think of him being beaten and slashed,
A cat of nine tails,
He cried out in anguish, and shook with pain,
But His power prevailed,
They spit in his face and shoved a crown of thorns to his brow,
Though they nailed him to rugged wood that sent splenters down his ragged back,
He hung shameful and pained,
The King of Kings hanging on a rack,
His feet nailed in place,
He could have given up, told His Father, "Take me back!"
And He did it all for me, for those lies that I've told,  for the sins that I've done,
To turn my back on his open arms,
I've been the one to spit in His face,
But His love turned on the alarms,
And sent me running back to his nail pierced hands.

I am who God made me...

I am not who you say I am,
I am not who you perceive me to be,
I am not who you think I should be,
Can't you see?
I don't want to be others little doll or model,
A little piece of nothing, a mold or clay in a bottle,
No different then all the others,
The fakers and makers, while they hide all their troubles,
Underneath all their make-up and skin,
Lies a black heart, darkened from within,
While I sit beside, looking bland and me,
They are all diva's and drama queens,
While they wallow in self-pity and catastrophy,
I sit aside, happy with the life God planned for me.